questions...with a quick swift answer ><>

Right now, in this moment, I am having to walk out all I have learned, been trained in, and claim to believe. Can I share something?....it is a LOT easier to talk about it than to have to actually do...to come from where i was, to where i am, in such a short period of time was a mind blowing miracle of God! It is great, but the thing is life didn't just become a cake walk and all...it is still very very very tough. In the past 8 months I have had everything I could ever imagine, lost some, and gained more. I've been in a relationship with a beautiful woman of God, worked in ministry, been prepared and ready to start back in college, and asked to speak all the time. Now, all of a sudden, i am single (hello ladies..hahaha), waiting tables, and hardly get to speak to more than a group of friends hanging out. WHAT THE HECK is going on? Why God? What did i do? Where are you? Am I in trouble? Did i miss something? Do You have something better? These are all question i find myself asking Jesus. Most of them are humorous if you actually think about them, but I'm just being real with you guys. In my past when things would have gotten "bad" like this i would have given up and quit. The difference is i know my God. I trust Him even when i don't want to. I believe His promises. All I'm hearing Him say is "Philip, GET BACK UP...get UP son." See all the things i mentioned early about having 8 months ago are great...but Jesus is better. I believe He wanted to show me quickly the blessing He had for me. God gave me all these things so quick b/c He loves me and knew i needed to see Him at work in my life b/c i was growing in Him. Now comes the hard, but oh so rewarding part....working on my fruit (long suffering seems to be the main one right now....) Though i have made mistakes none of them are the reasons for the "things I've lost" recently. This is just life. We as Christians have to work everyday on knowing Jesus better and walking this life out with Him. Though most of the changes haven't been life shattering, I have learned and grown so much from them it is crazy. God is showing out in my life every time i take the time to look. Every promise He makes are true! He is ALWAYS FAITHFUL! Now in this moment, season, period of my life I am stepping out of the boat, standing on the water, and trusting God for everything. He is always GOOD! I'm slowly learning to trust God in every area of my life. He knows whats best. He has had it planned out from the beginning. God is the compass that keeps me strait. Knowing Him more and seeing Jesus made famous is my mission. Nothing is allowed to get in the way...I have PURPOSE!...in Jesus. My plans aren't always God's plans. My vision must shift to match His. My steps must match the ones Jesus laid out for me LONG LONG LONG ago. I know this..I have a God, a Daddy, who loves me unconditionally. We don't earn, nor lose, His love. It just is! Quite yourselves and listen for His voice. He wants to speak to us tonight! Psalm 37:7 is what I'm sticking to right now. I want to encourage everyone to read the entire chapter if you will ;)...haha...i guess through all of this I'm trying to say that..."Jesus loves me just the way I am...and nothing can fill the place of Him." Things are good, but Jesus is better!!!!

WATER ><>

Surrounded by emptiness
Lost is the world of man
I cry out Your name in the desert
You reach out and grab my hand

I'm drowning in the river around me
There is no footing to stand
This water I'm drinking is Jesus
My one and only true friend

I push through and press in when I'm lonely
To praise when i don't think i can
Holy Fire come down and consume me
You have given me power over this land

Why is it so easy
To go down the wrong road
I choose a temporary fix
Instead of letting Jesus help me grow

This world of chaos and disillusion
Can sure bring a child down
I bind the spirit of confusion
God is placing my feet on solid ground!

LOST

I'm so lost i can't see or hear
The darkness is so bright, but i have no fear
A feeling that surpasses all understanding
I'm sucked in deep, there is no hideing

I can't get away, trust me I tried
I'm so lost that I can't find my pride
where is the comfort I've lived with for so long
There is no norm, it's vanished, it's gone

Every moment is fresh in this new place I found
I can't figure this out, but I'm on solid ground
I've never met these people but I see their faces
There must be a purpose for the filling of empty spaces

It's not so bad being lost in here
It's as if my world has become so clear
That it! I know! Everything I've heard is true
I know where I am...I'm lost in YOU!

DREAMS...

As I look at this world through brand new eyes,
I see great, huge, and meaningful dreams that money can't buy.
A man with a goal is a dangerous thing...not for you or for me because it sets us free.
The goal is of God, He planned it from the start.
My Lord already knew this vision...I'm set apart.
Being perfect I will never achieve
So i move forward by hitting my knees.
I see His way and i choose to follow God's feet.
Nonstop until the journey is done, I die everyday 'till this battle's complete
Who am i to deserve such a beautiful encounter?
I'm a chosen child of the most High with a HUGE allowance!
So hold on world I'm coming out blazing...
I will fight until the sky cracks and Jesus rides in...you better get ready...
THIS DREAM IS AMAZING!!!

A Man's heart during his Journey

A man's ideal woman is someone so hidden in Christ that the only way to find her is through God Himself. A woman who produces rightousness within himself and challenges him to grow and act properly in ALL aspects. A beautiful woman of God inside and out. It is the choice of a man to do things properly and in the correct spirit. If we ( men) decide we want a Godly relationship...b/c everything is a choice...then the only woman that will catch our eye is the one who isn't trying to catch anyone's eye except God himself. Respect is demanded and recieved b/c it's the only way to the woman. A good girl brings out the best is a Godly man. I dare to say that God has given us a vision of the "perfect" woman. It will vary for each man, but in the end it fits perfectly. Wait on God to place her in front of you and watch the magic happen! God so knows what He's doing and we are strengthened in the wait. Receive what God is giving and see HIM in every situation!

NOLA <><...

Psalm 80

God has really really been speaking to me through this...PLEASE READ!!!

Psalm 80 (New International Version)

Psalm 80

For the director of music. To the tune of "The Lilies of the Covenant." Of Asaph. A psalm.

1 Hear us, O Shepherd of Israel,
you who lead Joseph like a flock;
you who sit enthroned between the cherubim, shine forth
2 before Ephraim, Benjamin and Manasseh.
Awaken your might;
come and save us.

3 Restore us, O God;
make your face shine upon us,
that we may be saved.

4 O LORD God Almighty,
how long will your anger smolder
against the prayers of your people?

5 You have fed them with the bread of tears;
you have made them drink tears by the bowlful.

6 You have made us a source of contention to our neighbors,
and our enemies mock us.

7 Restore us, O God Almighty;
make your face shine upon us,
that we may be saved.

8 You brought a vine out of Egypt;
you drove out the nations and planted it.

9 You cleared the ground for it,
and it took root and filled the land.

10 The mountains were covered with its shade,
the mighty cedars with its branches.

11 It sent out its boughs to the Sea, [a]
its shoots as far as the River. [b]

12 Why have you broken down its walls
so that all who pass by pick its grapes?

13 Boars from the forest ravage it
and the creatures of the field feed on it.

14 Return to us, O God Almighty!
Look down from heaven and see!
Watch over this vine,

15 the root your right hand has planted,
the son [c] you have raised up for yourself.

16 Your vine is cut down, it is burned with fire;
at your rebuke your people perish.

17 Let your hand rest on the man at your right hand,
the son of man you have raised up for yourself.

18 Then we will not turn away from you;
revive us, and we will call on your name.

19 Restore us, O LORD God Almighty;
make your face shine upon us,
that we may be saved.

MoMeNt

The other night i was with a friend, well two friends actually. Me and my buddy were praising and hanging out with God. I've been praying hard for God to show me what it is He has for me. Like really really hard. As i was talking with Daddy he began to take me back to moments in my life. One at a time God took me to actual moments I have gone through. Starting at a very bad time. I saw myself getting high, i saw myself having my first real encounter with God, i saw myself worshiping in truth for the first time. I saw myself a/b to kill myself. I saw myself broken and beat down crying out to Jesus, I saw myself making a decision to NOT go back but to press forward toward the highest calling. All kinds of moments. Then i saw the very moment that was happening. Like an out of body experience where i was watching the here and now. I got exciting b/c i just "knew" he was a/b to show me my future. Boy was i excited. When it was time to see it (i knew the next scene was a/b to happened) God showed me ............ nothing? Wait a second...this isn't it.... what's going on God? All i saw was a blank white screen almost. Like i was staring at a TV that had a white screen. OK, OK God. Your obviously not ready to show the future yet. Then this morning God gave me my daily manna, revelation. When someone is soooo zoned in on something they can't see the big picture. All i could see what this blank white screen. God's just screaming to us...back up....back up...back up...As we begin to back up we realize God has painted this beautiful picture of our lives, but we are soooo zoned in on something (what's next God?) it's like our face is smushed up against this beautiful painting. All we can see is one color. Then we begin to back up and see more colors...more colors...more colors...WoW....What a beautiful painting it really is!!! Thank you Father for loving me enough to paint a picture for and about me!

Waiting on God

Sometimes it gets really hard for me to just sit back and wait. I am the type of person who like to press the issue or "make it happen". So, to figure out why God has me wait i have trouble understanding. Obviously it has to have something to do with the fact, Philip is not ready. That's a tough pill to swallow. I think humans always feel ready..in some form or fashion. I know i do. I got a word last night at church...Sometimes it is all about being at the right place, at the right time! God has plans. We all know this. I'm starting to see we have to do our part or His plans can not come to fruition. We can not trade what we want most for what we want at the moment (thanks Dad). The Word says to WAIT upon the Lord and He will RAISE us up. So yes, i wait. I know the calling, I know the blessings, I know what God has for me. Now I must do my part so I am prepared to do and have ALL THESE THINGS! It is not easy....very hard accually, but I will stand on His Word...I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. God i pray for wisdom, strength, and peace. I thank you for them. REVIVAL is BREAKING!!!